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Sexual Perversion In Marriage
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Sexual Perversion In Marriage

HEB 13:4 Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.

If you have grown up with a sexual perversion problem then you tend to bring that into your marriage and try to practice it with your mate. The problem is, that your mate may not share your abnormal sexual desires and feel used and defiled by you after you have pushed them into meeting your particular sexual perversion needs. This can put a lot of pressure on your marriage and create a spiritual conflict in both you and your spouse because in your hearts you both know that what you are doing is not normal or healthy for your marital relationship.

If you have a perversion problem, then just know that there is hope for you, but it will take some work on your part. Abnormal sexual desires usually start when we are very young and developing psychologically, and conversely sexually. It creates a foundation of thinking in you sexually that will be revealed more later on when you become more sexually active. It is an established preference just like having a favorite food like say, pizza. You cannot just talk yourself out of a perversion problem, you must change it at its source with God's daily help.

We get a wrong sexual foundation because we have believed wrong things about ourselves and it usually involves our relationships with our parents of what did or did not happen during our childhood. In order to change, we must allow the Holy Spirit to take us back and show us what went wrong and where, so that He can reveal the lies we have believed and then tell us the truth. Then it will just be a matter of training yourself to reject the lies and accept the truth on a daily basis until your psychological and sexual foundations progressively change.

Remember, perversion is anything that is used outside its original intent of design. God created sex to be a mutually pleasurable act intended to create children and give a married couple (male and female) greater intimacy and physical enjoyment together. Anything that is outside of this definition is likely sexual perversion, and should not be practiced. Usually we know in our heart if something is not right but we ignore it. If you're not sure if something you are doing is sexual perversion I have made a list for you at the end, but it's a bit graphic.

JN 8:32 Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."

Some things you will need to change in order to get free is your thought life, and media viewing life. If you feed the lie it will just get stronger, but if you starve it, it becomes weaker. You must stop thinking about sexual perversion, viewing sexual perversion, and practicing it. If you do, eventually it will start to die. You must think, view, and practice only the truth and the truth will then become stronger and dominate your life. Bring things out into the open with your spouse and apologize if necessary. Pray together daily, and ask for God's help.

Here is a prayer to pray of you need it:

"Dear God, I confess to you this day that I have a problem with sexual perversion, and I am asking you to help me to change and to walk in what is right from now on. Please forgive me God for every act of sexual perversion that I have ever committed against myself and/or anyone else, and help me to heal and repair my damaged sexual foundation. Thank you for forgiving me and helping me to change. I know Lord that you gave me sex as a gift to enjoy with my spouse, but I have wrongly misused and abused it. I ask that you would help me and my spouse (or girlfriend, boyfriend, or fiance) to become more sexually healthy together and to walk in what's right. In Jesus name I ask and give thanks for all these things, amen."

Some extra scriptures to help you:

1CO 6:9 Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders 10 nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

JUDE 1:7 In a similar way, Sodom and Gomorrah and the surrounding towns gave themselves up to sexual immorality and perversion. They serve as an example of those who suffer the punishment of eternal fire.

RO 1:26 Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones. 27 In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion.

MT 5:27 "You have heard that it was said, `Do not commit adultery.' 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.

List of sexual perversions (Like I said, this can be a little bit graphic)

Rape (This also includes playing like you are raping your spouse)

Sodomy (The anus was created as an orifice to eliminate bodily waste, nothing more)

Molestation (Touching or having sexual relations with a child)

Incest (Having sex with someone in your own family)

Spanking (This includes spanking yourself)

Viewing pornography (for any reason, even to it's just to get aroused with your spouse)

Masturbation (Even if you are just thinking about your spouse, which is rarely the real case)

Oral sex (beyond just foreplay, where there is no intercourse involved with your mate)

Bondage (tying someone up, or being tied up in any fashion for sexual power or pleasure)

S & M-Sado-Masochism (Inflicting or receiving pain to become sexually stimulated)

Bestiality/Zoophilia (sex with animals)

Urinating or defecating on someone (Self-explanatory)

Cross dressing (Wearing any article of clothing that is exclusively worn by the opposite sex)

Homosexuality (Yes this is sexual perversion. Even if society accepts it, God does not)

Role playing (We need to make love to our spouse, not to an imaginary sexual partner)

Fantasizing (This includes thinking about porn, or anyone or anything else during sex)

Fetishism (Women's panties, shoes, nylons, feminine clothing, stuffed toys, latex, etc.)

And anything else that differs from God's original design for sex. God doesn't want to ruin your fun, He just wants you to walk in the truth and experience His blessing on that part of your life. Satan wants to pervert sex so that it damages and brings judgment upon your life.